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My husband and I decided early on that we were going to require our son to do chores. Since Parker loves to help out, we recently started implementing chores for him. At this age (not even two), he is mostly just "helping" us while we do something, but we hope this will help in setting a foundation for chores in the future. I started to do research on age-appropriate chores, so I am sharing that information with you! :-)
According to the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, the Child Mind Institute, The Child Development Institute, and The Center for Parenting Education:
Benefits of Chores
learn and practice time management
begin to develop organizational skills
accept responsibilities as part of the family
have an opportunity to experience success and feel a sense of achievement
learn to balance work and play
increases self-esteem
children are better able to handle frustration
children are better able to delay gratification
increases academic achievement
Tips for Implementing Chores
While it may seem faster to just do it yourself, it will be more beneficial in the long run to help your child learn these skills.
Be sure to pick age-appropriate tasks so they are able to be successful
Set clear and reasonable expectations (be very specific when giving your child directions)
Establish regular routines (for example: we clean up the playroom before dinner).
For younger children, pick small and manageable tasks
Use songs or games if you can for younger kids
Set up a chore chart and/or reward system to monitor progress visually
Be a good role model - they are more likely to pick things up and be neat if you do
Use positive feedback and reinforcement
Choose your battles
Send the message that these tasks are required to help your household run smoothly
Provide consequences (not angrily but in a neutral tone) - the consequences could be linked to allowances (if you do that) or natural consequences.
Tips for Starting Chores with Older Children
So perhaps you did not start chores when your children were little, but now you would like to implement them with your older children. You absolutely can!
Have a family meeting to discuss
Ask for input
Discuss how to overcome obstacles (especially if you have tried implementing chores before)
Update your chore plan at regular intervals
Be specific
Link chores to real life skills and
Link chores to future independence (example: You will need to be able to cook when you go to college)
When choosing chores for older children, consider the following questions
What chores do you want to be completed in your home?
What chores would fit with your child's or children's personality?
What are the most meaningful chores for your household to run successfully?
What chores are developing the most life skills for your children?
Will you tie allowance or other rewards to your chores?
Age Appropriate Chores
Ages 2 - 3:
(Remember at this age they need supervision and guidance (perhaps a lot of guidance depending on the task and child)
Put toys away
Put groceries away
Help feed pets
Putting clothes in the laundry basket
Wiping up spills
Dusting
Picking up around the house
Helping load the washer/dryer
Ages 4 - 5
At this age, your child may have slightly more independence with their chores from ages 2 -3 and you may be able to add a couple more chores.
In addition to the chores listed for ages 2 -3, children ages 3 - 4 can do the following:
Make the bed
Clear the dinner table
Pull Weeds
Use a small vacuum (hand-held)
Water flowers
Help put dishes away
Load the dishwasher
Help set the table
Sorting laundry by color
Ages 6 - 9
At this age, your child can do a lot more without your help. Though this is also where you may start seeing some resistance to doing chores. Be patient and consistent!
Your children can still do all of the task listed above, and they can also:
Sweep/Mop
Help make school lunches
Help with yardwork
Clean bedroom
Put away groceries
Load/empty the dishwasher
Vacuum
Help with cooking
Fold and put away laundry
Ages 10 - 13
Kids continue to be more independent with tasks. A chore chart may be very helpful at this age to hold kids accountable and encourage self-reliance.
In addition to the tasks above, your child can:
Wash the dishes
Wash the car
Cook "easy" meals
Do the laundry
Take trash out
Ages 14 +
You name it, they can probably do it now. You may need to provide guidance on your expectations. This is a good time to make sure your child has the life skills needed to leave home.
Some additional chore ideas:
Help with deep cleaning
Clean bathrooms
Clean kitchen
Mow the lawn
Care for pets
Grocery shop (once they can drive)
Iron
Help with simple repairs
Allowance:
Should chores be tied with allowance? There is a lot of controversy around this, so it deserves its own post. It is a personal choice. Check out this post for more information.
Remember Mama, you are doing a great job! You got this!
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